Spit-up On My Shoulder

Is there anywhere safe? I love sports and read the Sports section of my paper every day. I was angry yesterday to find that even the Sports section isn’t immune to new mom judgment.

Lindsay Davenport, a professional tennis player, played doubles in a match this last weekend with her doctor’s approval. Six weeks ago Lindsay delivered her first baby by Caesarean section. Her husband and newborn son were with her at the match.

Here are some of Lindsay’s quotes from Paul Bauman’s article. My comments are in parentheses:

“It’s turned into a bigger story than I’m comfortable with (playing at six weeks postpartum) … On one hand, it’s great because I think that being pregnant and being a mom you can still be active. On the other hand, some people can’t do stuff in six weeks, or four weeks. I’m not telling anyone what they should do. (I like that. No judgment of other moms and a compassionate view of how it’s different for every woman.)

There’s also a lot of debate about working moms and getting back in the workplace. To me, tennis is a job. I’m very fortunate that it only requires a few hours out of the day and that my son can be 20 feet from me and go to the gym with me. (What a dream job for a mom! Many full-time jobs require moms to be back on the job in six weeks or less.)

But I don’t think it’s necessarily a bad thing for a woman to go after her hopes and dreams even though she has a child. I think it can all be together. Some people strongly disagree, and I’ve heard from them already.” (Yep, even a job as flexible as Lindsay’s doesn’t stop people from criticizing.)

Lindsay also talked in the article about how she’s not going to play singles, which is more strenous than doubles, until she’s ready. Her next doubles tournament starts August 17th. Sounds like she is being smart and slowly easing her way back into work.

Why do people feel it’s OK to judge new mothers? We can’t seem, in this society, to trust that new parents know what’s best for their families. I support Lindsay in her choices. I also support you. I know you have the strength to make good decisions for your family. Plus, the beauty of it is, you can always readjust as life changes.