Spit-up On My Shoulder

This week both of my daughters graduated from their respective schools. One from elementary school (Linda) and one from junior high (Danielle). In so many ways these changes feel like experiencing birth again. They are more steps in the process of letting go that begins at childbirth - no wonder the intense part of labor is called “transition.”

When Danielle was born, I remember thinking, “I can’t believe I’m a mother.” This week I’m thinking, “I can’t believe I’m now the mother of a junior high schooler AND a high schooler.”

Linda went to her first dance this week and had a blast. On the last day of school, Danielle asked a boy if he’d like to “go out” with her (meaning on a date). He said “Yes” and she’s on cloud 9, but she still doesn’t know where they will go. I’m amazed that at almost 15 she had the courage to do this. I would never have been brave enough to ask someone out at that age - in fact, I don’t think I did that until college or later.

All of these changes require me to step back some as a mom, yet still be here to listen and guide them when they let me. It was so fun to brainstorm with Danielle about how she would approach the boy. It was also a joy to hear her tell how it went when she arrived home - you should have seen the grin on her face!

Helping Linda decide what to wear to graduation and to the dance was also fun (especially since I hadn’t seen her in a skirt or dress for about 7 years - no lie! - all she usually wears are soccer shorts, even in winter.) She looked so beautiful that I almost cried. At her 6th grade graduation I did cry - no more elementary school, my baby is getting so grown up! - it’s a big change.

Once you have kids in grade school you’ll see that about two weeks before school is out the schedule starts to get crazy - end-of-the-year field trips and events, graduations, field days (where the kids do athletic competitions), and, eventually, dances. So tonight I’m going out with girlfriends to reward myself for making it through the last weeks of school and to celebrate a buddy’s birthday.

I also plan on finding some time alone soon to journal and reflect on all of these changes: the girls growing taller, the young women they are becoming, the new things that are happening in all of our lives, our plans now as a family. I do have times where I freak out about it all (it’s going by so fast), but, when I remember to flow with things and enjoy who my daughters are right now, it’s a joy like no other.

I’m hope you also are able to find time soon to reflect on yourself and what you are experiencing currently as a mother. What changes are you and your children experiencing? How do you feel about the changes?

Special Note: Happy Father’s Day to my Dad readers! We appreciate all that you do.