Spit-up On My Shoulder

Before I get into today’s topic, would you like to email me directly? You can now click on the Contact Melanie button under my photo at the left and your message will go right to my in-box. I look forward to your questions and comments.

Often when I talk to pregnant women, I’ll find they have grand ideas for what they are going to accomplish in the months after their baby is born. They plan on catching up on years of photo albums, redecorating rooms, organizing garages, moving to a new home even, and the list goes on. I’ll tell them that they may not have the time for those things with a new baby in tow. Then they’ll respond, “But babies sleep all the time. Won’t I be able to get a lot done?”

Those of us who have had babies know the shock of discovering that a little human being can suck up all your time and energy. So, please, don’t plan on any big projects or life changes soon after becoming a mom. Eleanor, a woman profiled in my book, received some great advice from her own mother. Her mom said, “Don’t expect to get anything done the first three months. Then, anything you do get done, you can feel good about yourself.”

Jennifer, another woman in Why Didn’t Anyone Tell Me?, closed escrow on a house two days before giving birth. She and her family moved to the new house when her baby was only seven weeks old. She says, “All the packing and unpacking would have taken half the time without a baby. My husband and I both had an insane level of fatigue during the move…It’s amazing how time-consuming it is to have a new baby. I would definitely never make a move so close to the birth of a child again.”

Plus, who wants all of that pressure to complete projects when it’s more fun to spend the time falling in love with your baby?